For the majority of the day, I was stuck at work, where the most exciting thing was acquiring these new elastic sea creatures to add to my collection. Fuck.
After work, I picked up Dylan.
We went to my house, where my mother informed us she just smoked a joint, but denied it as soon as I attempted to videotape/photograph her confession. This is Dylan being creepy and cracking up as Gina flees the scene of the crime.
Then we went upstairs where Dylan showed me the most disturbing/hilarious porno of all time.
After being thoroughly horrified, we headed over to Lauren's house where we met up with Mary and Ian. And Chili's tortilla chips, nomnom.
Once we were settled in Lauren's deathtrap, we discovered this fantastic book.
It includes wonderful things, like the position Jared and I are supposed to use on his birthday. Give me an A(shley)! Coincidence? I think nottttttt!
And also this position (for my birthday), except I don't think it's humanly possible. How rude.
This is Dylan's infamous "YEEE!" which he claims relieves copious amounts of stress. I'm relatively certain he popped a vein in his neck during this particular rendition.
We somehow ended up at a gay bar called "State" which, for whatever reason, housed Lauren's IPod charger. Dylan was in absolute cat-calling heaven.
Then we tried to go look at giant dildos, only Amazing was closed. And the sign refused to be visible in photographs.
And last, but certainly not least, we have a complicated trip to McDonalds wherein Lauren loses her mind.
Happy Memorial Day, kittens.