Saturday, June 27, 2009

Pretend

My family is going away until September, which is the best thing that could ever possibly happen in my life.

As we all know, I adore playing house. I love cooking and cleaning and watching Oprah and folding laundry. I'm going to persuade my friends to stop by with frequency (for the sole purpose of setting out baked goods on the table).

I'm also hoping to finish my room. I've been "painting" since May, and I still haven't put up the first coat. It's just that I'm horrible at staying in the lines, and I want it to be perfect. It's going to look awful, just as it always has.

In other news, I changed my blog's layout. Opinions?

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Removal

After much evaluation, I have decided to rid my life of all its toxins.

I will not mull over men who want nothing to do with me.
I will realize that people don't care what my hair looks like.
I will stop eating gross things.
I will not have sex with people I don't care about.
I will make an effort to move and explore more.
I will attempt to think positively.
I will not be held by invisible boundaries.
I will replace complaints with solutions.
I will spend more time with my friends and family.
I will believe people when they tell me I am beautiful.
I will be kind, but not naive.
I will trust, but maintain a level of privacy.
I will love.
I will sing.
I will smile.

And this will be enough.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Halt

I blindfolded you and delicately painted my lips over yours.
I was acting, like I always do.
You shuddered, and had I been able to see your eyes, they would have rolled back into their sockets.

I fucked you and it was your birthday.
I hate you because I played my favorite song
and all you could say was "This is stupid."
You would have changed your answer had you known.
Love me, love me, love me.

Your very first mistake was giving me the illusion of power.
But how could you have known, from your shelf above the washing machine?